When Relationships Collide

Success in life, both personally and professionally, is dependent upon our ability to successfully interact with the people around us. There is no success without positive relationships in our lives. A successful relationship is not a relationship without conflict. There is no such thing as a relationship without conflict; therefore, a successful relationship is one in which conflict is resolved.

Too many people make the mistake in their personal or professional lives of avoiding conflicts and simply not dealing with them. While in the short term, this tactic may result in a brief period of peace, the reality is that the conflict continues to build to an unmanageable point until it explodes, often making a resolution at that point impossible.

The solution to this is quite simple: Deal with all conflicts the day they arise.

My wife and I have had a policy for many years that has served us well. We deal with any potential conflict immediately. If a problem is not dealt with the day it arises, it is considered out-of-bounds at the end of the day. This forces you to either let the situation go or deal with the conflict immediately before it multiplies into something unmanageable.

We have all been in situations where someone irrationally explodes over the most minor situation. In their mind, it is not a minor situation because they are dealing with a massive pile of issues that they have let accumulate over weeks, months, or even years. Then the proverbial straw breaks the camel’s back and irreparable damage is done to that relationship.

Ancient wisdom teaches us, “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger.” Either release it or deal with it while it’s a minor issue, and every day you will start out with a clean slate in dealing with people in your personal and professional life.

Jim Stovall, Today’s the Day (Colorado Springs, CO: David C. Cook, 2010).